'A relationship is 50/50' - Not!
I hear the phrase more often than not, and maybe you have heard it too. Unfortunately it is one of those phrases that gets passed around as a passing comment without actually knowing any real details or only knowing one side of the said relationship.
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| I see through colour, what do you see through? |
With that being said let me ask you a question.
What scale do you look through?
1) Is it the classic black and white?
2) Do you have grey in your scale?
You are probably asking why does it matter? I will tell you why It matters because everyone perceives moments/ situation/things differently. For example my scale is coloured. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
However, there was a time I only viewed things in the restricted black and white.
When I was young I had always promised my self never to settle with anyone who does not give me 50/50 in a relationship. Little did I know I had already condemned my thirteen year old ass to fail. Why? Because that expectation is set remarkably high, not just for my future partner but also for my future self.
'A healthy relationship should be a support system 100%. '
With that being said can you imagine the pressure you place on yourself to make sure you were always one hundred percent to give your fifty percent in the relationship?
Based on a 50/50 relationship you are assuming you both share the same strength physically and mentally.
What if one of youse are ill?
What if you suffer a mental illness?
What if you work shifts or away?
What if you are tired?
What if you can't do it?
What if you don't have time?
What if you are not in a financially steady position?
What if it does not come naturally?
What if physically you can you do it?
What if they are unable to change?
Can you see how being in relationship may be viewed as a burden? It's like a contest, who ever does XYZ gets one more score to become the winner. Why would you want that? In a relationship you are suppose to be a team, that means when one member of the team is falling behind or needs a rest the other picks up the slack.
Although youse are equal in the same breath you are not. You will both have different weaknesses and strengths. The key is to utilise your strengths and support each others weaknesses.
But...…
You can only become a team if youse communicate and that involves LISTENING as well as SPEAKING.
Ditching the 50/50 relation gives you time to focus on other areas of your relationship that comes from the busy schedule of 50/50. Like you should never assume they feel loved. So send them a message, show them, Whispers those three words in their ear. Scream it from the roof tops.
You need to be honest with your self and others. So don't assume they know your emotions or thought process. Tell them. Share them. Because that bridge you are wanting too build needs two sides for it to be successful.
It takes time to find peace, it takes time to understand, it takes time to learn. We all learn at different paces. All you can do is;
Always be kind.
Always try your hardest.
Always be honest.
& things will work out if they are meant too be.
Choi!
Based on a 50/50 relationship you are assuming you both share the same strength physically and mentally.
What if one of youse are ill?
What if you suffer a mental illness?
What if you work shifts or away?
What if you are tired?
What if you can't do it?
What if you don't have time?
What if you are not in a financially steady position?
What if it does not come naturally?
What if physically you can you do it?
What if they are unable to change?
'A relationship being 50/50 is one of the biggest misconceptions ever to surface. '
Can you see how being in relationship may be viewed as a burden? It's like a contest, who ever does XYZ gets one more score to become the winner. Why would you want that? In a relationship you are suppose to be a team, that means when one member of the team is falling behind or needs a rest the other picks up the slack. 
Although youse are equal in the same breath you are not. You will both have different weaknesses and strengths. The key is to utilise your strengths and support each others weaknesses.
But...…
You can only become a team if youse communicate and that involves LISTENING as well as SPEAKING.
Ditching the 50/50 relation gives you time to focus on other areas of your relationship that comes from the busy schedule of 50/50. Like you should never assume they feel loved. So send them a message, show them, Whispers those three words in their ear. Scream it from the roof tops.
You need to be honest with your self and others. So don't assume they know your emotions or thought process. Tell them. Share them. Because that bridge you are wanting too build needs two sides for it to be successful.It takes time to find peace, it takes time to understand, it takes time to learn. We all learn at different paces. All you can do is;
Always be kind.
Always try your hardest.
Always be honest.
& things will work out if they are meant too be.
Choi!
