Do not comply to the stigma

So i havent blogged in god knows how long, but in all fairness i did loose my head. No honestly life just got so hectic i totally went completely wild with ignoring this page. Anyway, long story short revision took over, motherhood, job hunting, and cleaning the house. But i am back. I thought my first piece back would be based on the challenges i faced, the stigma surrounding being a teenage mom. I am aware that when they people ask my age and i say i have two children, they always ask my age. Act shocked and then double take. I am also aware they probably have a picture in there little heads that i am jobless, with no financial income beside my benefits and i probably dont know who the father is , and all i do is sit on my arse all day and consume endless amount of alcohol. It use to get me infuriated but now i let it slide, i am hoping to change their views but mostly yours (mother to be) or a (mother). So i written you a letter.

Dear momma Scared to achieve greatness.

You Can Do This!

Do not Be Scared!

There comes to a point in life where ‘Fun’ does not include clubbing, drinking or stumbling through the door at dawn, or even thinking about yourself.

Fun means, wiping bogies, hearing tiny footsteps, long cuddles, a messy house, bedtime stories, being silly and hearing little voices whisper ‘I love you’.

Becoming a parent does not change you, it makes you realise that the little people that you created deserve the very best of your time. They make you determine to achieve greatness because now it isn’t just you relying on your potential, it’s those little darlings that call you mam.

Becoming a parent means saying good-bye to loneliness, as every minute of the day and night you are needed. Whether they want cuddles, kisses or your comfort. They need you, and there is nothing wrong with that. You will never be without company. Something so small and delicate can change your life around overnight, they can create an impact that is so beautiful you are lost for words every time you lay your eyes on them. Their gummy smile, will make your day. Their laugh is contagious. Their love is forever.

Becoming a parent is nothing short of a miracle. Without any training, you are equipped with so many qualifications you though you never had. For example, you are a nurse, a bank, a teacher, a chief, a story teller, a shift co-coordinator, a dancer, a gymnast, an exercise planner, a cleaner, a personal shopper, a researcher, a Councillor, a psychologist. My all-time favorite is a referee and a soldier, fighting all the monsters away before bedtime. Majority of these qualifications you cannot place on your cv (you could but it would raise questions if they did not have humor) but who cares? Your child will remember everything you have done for them. They will appreciate every step you take for them.

Becoming a parent made me yearn to achieve greatness, and because of my two darlings I would not have sat my last law degree exam today. In the past three years we have overcome every obstacle possible. From moving home (three times), to sickness bugs (chicken pox, flu, colds, temperatures), to a second birth of our late edition to the family, to struggling with work load and a job, to family problems. It was worth it, so do not lose hope, every turn you take adds up to something amazing. That feeling of success does not die. Be Proud, every little step you take is not just for you. My little girl has pulled me from so many dark places I would be absolutely lost without her, she makes me pretend cups of tea, plays with my hair, and even wipes away my tear when I am sad, comforting me and insisting I talk to her. Her fiery and caring personality is what makes me proud.  She doesn’t know that yet, but she will do one day. My two darling are the reason I got this far.

Do not let anyone tell you differently. If I did, I would not have even finished college. I’d be probably sat at home on my arse, claiming any benefit I could. But I am not! Do not let the stigma hit you, do not let other people opinions blind you. Do not let yourself think low of yourself.

Just remember momma, you have got this!

You are a super, ninja, cuddle, loving hero!

You will achieve greatness.